By Santiago Lake
The following poem is copyright protected and any use of this work without the permission of the author is expressly prohibited.
There was a man named John
Who lived all by himself,
His life was somewhat empty,
Despite his inherent wealth.
One day he came across an idea
That seemed a bit out of sorts,
He would dress in hot pink, orange, and magenta
Female boxer shorts.
The idea struck him as funny
In an unusual sort of way,
And even in ladies clothing
He knew he couldn't be gay.
His game soon grew more intense
And he'd wear bright colored frocks,
He looked like a woman to the tee
From his thong, to his pink knee socks.
There came a day when John left his home
Ready to face the world,
Hoping against hope that his new clothes
Would make everyone think him a girl.
The first man that he walked up to
Gave John a smile and a wink,
He shyly batted his eyelashes
Trying to be cute, I think.
The man said "Hey baby, what's your name?
And can I get your digits?"
John quickly passed the lout on by saying
"Humph, man please. I ain't with it."
Soon he happened upon a woman,
With grace, finesse, and style,
Her womanly gifts set John aback,
She used her feminine wiles.
John gingerly tapped her shoulder
And she abruptly spun around,
"Please teach me to be a woman" said John
"And I'll pay you big bucks. How's that sound?"
"Well it does sound nice, and I need the money
But I'm not out here to deceive,
Just keep that money in your pocket John
I'm no woman. Its just me, Steve!"